Clarkson's Farm
It’s the pig one.
Follow Jeremy Clarkson as he embarks on his latest adventure, farming. The man who on several occasions claims to be allergic to manual labour takes on the most manually labour intensive job there is. What could possibly go wrong?
Cast
Jeremy Clarkson
Self - Host
Kaleb Cooper
Self - Farmer
Charlie Ireland
Self - Land Agent
Lisa Hogan
Self
Seasons
An intense, arduous and frequently hilarious year in the life of Britain’s most unlikely farmer, Jeremy Clarkson. Join Jeremy and his rag-tag band of agricultural associates as they face-up to a backdrop of unhelpful weather, disobedient animals, unresponsive crops and an unexpected pandemic. This is Jeremy Clarkson as you’ve never seen him before.
E1Tractoring
Jun 11, 2021
Jeremy Clarkson embarks on his path towards muddy misery and potential ruin by running his own farm.
E2Sheeping
Jun 11, 2021
Jeremy decides to get a flock of sheep, not realising the added complications these high-maintenance animals will bring.
E3Shopping
Jun 11, 2021
Jeremy Clarkson decides to open a farm shop to sell his own produce. This sounds like it should be easy. It isn't.
E4Wilding
Jun 11, 2021
Jeremy Clarkson decides to become a naturalist.
E5Pan (dem) icking
Jun 11, 2021
As Covid-19 puts Britain on lockdown, Jeremy suddenly finds that his biggest worries aren't all related to the upcoming lambing season.
E6Melting
Jun 11, 2021
Jeremy discovers why British farmers are always complaining about the weather. It's mostly because it never does what they want it to do.
E7Fluffing
Jun 11, 2021
As the drought drags on and the harvest time gets closer, Jeremy and his motley crew have a fearsome list of jobs to complete.
E8Harvesting
Jun 11, 2021
After months of hard work Clarkson's farm arrives at a make or break moment; harvest time.
Another year in the life of Diddly Squat Farm, run by Jeremy Clarkson, Britain's best-known but least-qualified amateur farmer. In an effort to increase his annual profit (£144 last year) he's diversifying, in the shape of cows, more chickens and his own restaurant.
E1Surviving
Feb 10, 2023
Jeremy Clarkson sets out to diversify, as a way of increasing his annual profit (£144 last year).
E2Cowering
Feb 10, 2023
Jeremy's new herd of cows settle in, but soon reject the fence that keeps them in.
E3Schmoozing
Feb 10, 2023
Faced with Council powers that be, Jeremy uses two of his greatest skills: diplomacy and respect for red tape.
E4Badgering
Feb 10, 2023
Jeremy Clarkson comes face to face with his nemesis: the badger.
E5Council-ing
Feb 10, 2023
The day of the Council's decision on Jeremy's restaurant arrives.
E6Counselling
Feb 10, 2023
The fall-out from the Council's decision continues to fall out.
E7Scheming
Feb 10, 2023
Jeremy's restaurant idea is re-born, and there's not a moment to waste.
E8Climaxing
Feb 10, 2023
Secret preparations accelerate for the opening of Jeremy's restaurant.
After the triumphant finale of Season 2, we return to Diddly Squat to find everything in turmoil. The council has shut the restaurant and the weather is ruining the crops. Desperate for new income streams Jeremy enters a world of pig breeding, goat attacks and mushroom mountains. Meanwhile Kaleb, promoted to farm manager, deals with an unwelcome rival. The funniest, most heartbreaking season yet.
E1Unfarming
May 3, 2024
We return to Diddly Squat to find the farm in turmoil. The Council has shut down the restaurant, the weather is making planting crops impossible and costs are on the up. Jeremy needs to formulate a new plan to get his farm through the year.
E2Porking
May 3, 2024
Jeremy sets to work getting the farm ready for its newest residents, some Sand and Black pigs. Meanwhile Kaleb is annoyed when he spots someone else drilling in his fields.
E3Jobbing
May 3, 2024
It's Christmas time on the farm and Kaleb gives Jeremy a festive surprise. However their relationship becomes strained as they bicker while getting on with the farms winter jobs.
E4Harrowing
May 3, 2024
Jeremy treats Kaleb to something he hopes will help with his farming, and Lisa and Jeremy discover just how tough being pig farmers can be.
E5Healing
May 10, 2024
Spring has sprung and rejuvinated Jeremy's farming the unfarmed idea, as he takes on multiple new projects to try and turn a profit from his unused land.. And there are some one week old arrivals to the farm to lift everyone's spirits.
E6Mushrooming
May 10, 2024
Jeremy's mushroom empire begins to appear all consuming as he struggles to keep on top of his newest venture and Kaleb and Charlie are off to London for a very important meeting.
E7Parking
May 10, 2024
Team Diddly assemble for a much needed building project and Jeremy brings in the Chairman of the British Deer Society to help with the deer management issues on the farm.
E8Calculating
May 10, 2024
Harvest time arrives and is tenser than ever, as Jeremy and Kaleb find out how profitable both Jeremy's new projects and Kaleb's arable farming have been this year.
Jeremy is taking on his most ambitious project yet, setting out to buy a pub that will reignite his Farm to Fork restaurant vision. But the road to becoming a landlord isn’t exactly straightforward, and with new faces, new livestock and new machinery arriving at the farm, life at Diddly Squat is busier than ever.
E1Solo-ing
May 23, 2025
Kaleb and Lisa are both away and Jeremy has been left to run the farm on his own. Help is soon needed, and the arrival of a new farmhand to ease the burden gives Jeremy space for some strategic thinking.
E2Pubbing
May 23, 2025
Jeremy has found a promising pub, Diddly Squat’s newest arrival teaches him a thing or two about farming, and the ageing Lamborghini has competition.
E3Crawling
May 23, 2025
Relentless wet weather puts the crop planting in crisis, Kaleb returns to find another farmer on his patch, and while his pub search continues, in an effort to dry the soil Jeremy gets to grips with a new piece of kit.
E4Cottaging
May 23, 2025
There’s a big new arrival at the farm, a much smaller one down in the pig pens, and it looks as though the pub search might finally be over.
E5Endgaming
May 30, 2025
It’s the middle of May, the livestock are heading out to graze, and while the goats are going high-tech, the cows are getting a bull-friend. If only progress with the pub was as positive.
E6Splurging
May 30, 2025
With his pub plan finally taking shape, Jeremy heads to his first cattle market to buy up some beef. But calling in the experts to help get the pub off the ground, Jeremy soon discovers the costs are only just beginning.
E7Hurrying
Jun 6, 2025
A diary cock-up turns the pub into a pressure cooker, and the start of the harvest runs Jeremy ragged. Team Diddly Squat will have to dig deep to get both across the line.
E8Landlording
Jun 6, 2025
It’s bank holiday weekend and the pub opens for business. Whether it stays open for business is another matter. Back at Diddly Squat, the harvest results come in and the curtain falls on another farming year.
Amidst a government budget that sends the UK farming community into uproar, Jeremy decides some big changes are needed to make the farm run more smoothly. But while the farm tries to go high-tech – resulting in Kaleb's first ever trip abroad – even bigger developments are heading for Diddly Squat that are going to prove much more of a challenge.
E1Operating
Jun 3, 2026
A health scare sees Jeremy looking for ways to make life at Diddly Squat less stressful. A new breed of sheep might help, but his new pub might not.
E2Storming
Jun 3, 2026
Jeremy hatches a plan for the pub's first festive season, kicking off in style when the Farmer's Dog hosts a gig by one of Ireland's biggest bands. Elsewhere, farmers from across the UK gather to protest the government's latest tax hikes.
E3Tripping
Jun 3, 2026
It's the new year and Jeremy decides Diddly Squat needs a bold new direction. Diving headlong into the world of high-tech farming, he takes Kaleb on his first ever trip abroad to find out how it's done.
E4Updating
Jun 3, 2026
Autonomous farming arrives at Diddly Squat. Which is just as well, because there are problems at the pub, and with the pigs.
E5Decapitating
Jun 10, 2026
Diddly Squat 2.0 continues to take shape with a new farm office and the arrival of a droid. The snails, meanwhile, have been getting along famously, and the cows are due to give birth any day.
E6Frazzling
Jun 10, 2026
Diddly Squat is basking in a sunny spell. There're baby animals aplenty, the high-tech crops are coming along nicely and there's a big night at the pub to look forward to. The only question is, when does a sunny spell become a drought?
E7Sickening
Jun 17, 2026
Jeremy busies himself with a project close to his heart, inviting over a local birdlife expert to offer advice on how Diddly Squat can be more friendly to its winged residents. And while things get heated when that advice clashes Kaleb's tried-and-tested farming ways, all is soon forgotten when - with the harvest looming - the farm is rocked by some devastating news.
E8Reaping
Jun 17, 2026
With the farm still reeling from its shock TB diagnosis, there's no time to dwell as the harvest arrives. This year's will be like no other, and only once the results are in can the Diddly Squat family take stock of this rollercoaster of a farming year.
Videos
Storyline
Follow Jeremy Clarkson as he embarks on his latest adventure, farming. The man who on several occasions claims to be allergic to manual labour takes on the most manually labour intensive job there is. What could possibly go wrong?
