The Secret Show

Sep 16, 2006

Someone is trying to steal The Secret Thing. Is it Changed Daily, Victor, Anita, or some sort of shape-changing Imposter? Can Victor tell the difference? And will he ever find out what The Secret Thing actually is..?

Sep 23, 2006

Someone is stealing Earth's gravity, causing the continents to float away. Victor and Anita stow away in one of the gravity-sucking machines; the trail leads to Mars, and falling-down parties - but unless they act fast, both planets are in trouble..

Sep 30, 2006

THEM have photographic proof that the World Leader eats her bogies. What does this have to do with the theft of a giant ball of bogies from the sculptor Alphonse? And why are all the Expendibles wearing nose-sheilds..?

Oct 7, 2006

Victor and Anita are on the run from UZZ after apparently giving the world leader's husband a wedgie on live TV. Soon, all of UZZ is hiding at Victor's mom's house in disguise. Could it be an Impostor plot? Is Changed Daily safe..?

Oct 14, 2006

Nanna Poopoo is kidnapping important people and using a babyizer ray to turn them into commando babies. Soon she will be the only adult. If Victor can manage to burp, he might stand a chance of stopping her...

Oct 14, 2006

How does Doctor Doctor know so much about UZZ operations? Well, it can't be anything to do with these cool wigs UZZ agents are wearing. But something is creeping around the base at night - something hairy...

Oct 21, 2006

Each time Helsinki Man tries to kill Victor and Anita, he yells "And that's for Helsinki!" It's starting to get a bit annoying. What are they supposed to have done - and why does Professor Professor insist that they must never go to Helsinki..?

Oct 21, 2006

The Floaty-heads demand The Ball of Spong, or they will seive the Earth. But the ball and Changed Daily are trapped in a Mark I Indestructable Survival Pod - with no food. And the ball smells kind of minty...

Oct 28, 2006

Doctor Doctor has a remote control for the Sun -- at least, until Victor steps on it. Now the only chance for the Earth is for them all to go to the Sun and relight it...

Oct 28, 2006

What is the secret of Robert Baron's secret room? In order to find out, Victor and Anita will have to be shrunk so that they can pass as children; and Professor Professor will have to wear a dress...

Nov 4, 2006

It's the most momentous moment in earth's history: first contact with a friendly alien race. Everything goes fine, until Anita eats the alien on live TV....

Nov 4, 2006

In a mirror universe where THEM rule the world, UZZ are reduced to delivering Pizza. But for the mirror Doctor Doctor, that's not enough: she wants our world, too...

Nov 11, 2006

Only the retired UZZ agent, Zac Meadows, can save the world from Dr Hypno. But all is not as it appears...

Nov 11, 2006

Why is everyone on Earth so sleepy - and dreaming of dancing? To defeat Doctor Doctor, Victor Anita and Changed Daily must fall asleep under laboratory controlled conditions. Professor Professor will even howl them to sleep...

Nov 18, 2006

Victor acquires a cloak that gives him super-powers, and gets carried away with the idea of being a superhero. But the cloak belongs to the one person that UZZ fear, Eartha Quakea, and UZZ must persuade him to give it back...

Nov 18, 2006

Professor Professor doesn't have to tell Victor and Anita why they have to rescue The Satellite That Goes Ping from the Bermuda Trapezoid. It's a secret. Doctor Doctor and the mutant piggies don't know either, but they want the satellite too...

Nov 25, 2006

If Victor and Anita don't find The Trousers Of Doom before Doctor Doctor does, the entire universe could just disappear. And Victor would never get his shoes back...

Nov 25, 2006

What is in Professor Professor's box? Why does everyone want to take it from Anita and Victor? Why must they not open it under any circumstances? And will Victor get to hold it..?

Dec 2, 2006

What did Doctor Doctor and Professor Professor work on in the abandoned space station when they were in The School For the Chronically Gifted together? Is it something that is trying to return to earth and wreak havoc..?

Dec 2, 2006

Who is The Kid, and why must Victor and his strangely brutish new partner protect him? What do the Reptogators have to do with all this? Anita plans to find out...

Dec 9, 2006

Victor doesn't believe that UZZs smallest agent is too small to be seen. Unfortunately for him, Mr Atom is also the shortest-tempered agent...

Dec 9, 2006

When Victor and Anita foil The Chef, he vows revenge - revenge that doesn't seem possible until Victor bites into a carrot, and it presses charges against him...

Dec 16, 2006

Victor has always wondered what the switch next to his chair in the briefing room does. But the answer to that question involves Reptogators, Impostors, and Almost Certain Doom...

Dec 16, 2006

What is the giant brain that UZZ have found frozen in ice in the arctic? The very last thing they should do is wake it up...

Dec 23, 2006

Professor Professor is convinced that no one can invent an uninventing ray. But it appears that Doctor Doctor has proved him wrong - and unless UZZ can do something about it, they'll end up saving the world with only stone axes to help them...

Dec 23, 2006

Due to an accident with a totally untested and highly dangerous teleport device, Victor and the villainous cat Mr Cuddles have got mixed up. Victor has nine lives and wants to chase balls of string; and Mr Cuddles now knows The Secret Code To Destroy The World...

Feb 17, 2007

UZZ don't stand a chance of catching the luckiest man in the world - unless Professor Professor can synthesise his luck and pass it on to Victor...

Feb 24, 2007

Doctor Doctor has two secret zombifying code words: say either one of them and you turn into a zombie. Unfortunately, the two words are "no" and "yes"...

Mar 3, 2007

Professor Professor sends Victor and Anita to infiltrate the Imposters' base - where they find that he was kidnapped by The Imposters a month ago, and never escaped...

Mar 10, 2007

It's time to pay the rent for the earth to the Ammonites - one slipper orchid from the top of Mount Kippabaru, once every thousand years. If The Imposters get to Ammonia first, they will control the Earth - to say nothing of what will happen if the Ammonites find out that the orchid is a plastic one...

Mar 17, 2007

A future Victor has come to warn UZZ that something terrible is about to happen. But he's not allowed to say what it is...

Mar 24, 2007

Someone is attaching weird little motor thingies to famous buildings and using them to hold illegal monument races. It's a terrible threat to security - what would happen if Doctor Doctor got hold of the technology..?

Mar 31, 2007

All the world's plumbers are missing. The trail leads to The Imposters, who have a plan to end the world as we know it. And Professor Professor's solution isn't very safe, either...

Apr 7, 2007

In which we learn the secret behind the spider in Changed Daily's breifing room - and why Imposters run away from Penguins...

The Floaty-heads have shrunk our solar system to give to Princess Ping as a mobile. Victor and Anita must pretend to be Floaty-heads so they can steal the solar system back, and escape. But Victor becomes fond of shy, insecure Ping, and wants to help...

After playing a part in an UZZ training film, The Birdman flips out when it is revealed that the film will never be shown in public. He steals the film, and intends to use it to get a career in the movies, and all the birdseed he can eat...

THEM have entered the World Anthem Competition, so Victor and Anita must enter as well, and find out why. Obviously they can't be planning to brainwash everyone with their song, because that only works in old cartoon shows...

Changed Daily is finally persuaded to talk about his nick-knacks. On the back of a picture of his old partner, Lucy Wu, they find a note asking him to rescue her - twenty years ago...

It's time for everyone to send carrots to Sweet Little Granny for the burrowless bunnies. But her show seems a little different this year; and why is everyone donating their house? Victor and Anita must find out quickly, because Changed Daily has donated the UZZ building...

The Wobble Men have finally broken through - and the only one that can save the world is Victor's father, trapped behind wobbly lines for twenty years...

On an undercover mission inside THEM's secret holiday resort, Victor wins the Best Evil Plan To Destroy UZZ competition...

Another one of Professor Professor's crazy cures for baldness has backfired. If Anita and Victor cannot recover the baldy gene from his identical twin brother, the world will be overrun by hair (and 20-foot-tall (6.1 m) head lice). The solution? Stage an opera...

What chance do UZZ have at saving the world from the Gobblotron when World Savers Inc. are so mysteriously good at it - and when Professor Professor has accepted a job with them..?

UZZ decide to cancel their line of Simon Sayz action figures and go with a computer game instead. Simon swears revenge. And he when accidentally gets covered with nano-goo, it looks like he'll get his wish - unless Anita can get to level 13 first...

The Floaty-Heads latest collection includes The World Leader and Changed Daily. There seems to be no-one who can break into their planet to rescue them. Well, maybe one person - someone that can break into any house, once a year, to leave presents...

Who gave Doctor Doctor the technology to take over UZZ base? Why does his snivelling sound so familiar to Professor Professor? How can UZZ and THEM possibly work together to save them all from the giant Purple Hole..?

The Secret Man has disappeared. To find him, Anita and Victor must locate The One Breath Woman, and - providing they can understand her - unravel an Imposter plot to take over the world...

An overworked Professor Professor has come down with Brain Seepage - some of his knowledge has been squeezed out in the form of a tiny planet orbiting his own head. Victor and Anita must travel there to retrieve a forgotten unlock code - or Changed Daily will be permanently turned into a very large orchid...

In which we learn the startling secret behind Anita's seawater seawater allergy, and fishfood torpedos and a giant sperm whale save the day..

Has Victor really stolen all the spoons in the world? Why are all the parrots shouting "help"? And why does everyone's hair look so messy? To see the answers, Victor must have his blind spots removed...

After saving the world from The Chef, Doctor Doctor, Reptogators, and Imposters, Victor and Anita have Save Fatigue and the world is taken over by a clown who demands that buildings wear silly hats and everyone says "bim"...

Why is The Secret Thing being stolen so frequently? Where has Doctor Doctor taken Changed Daily and his fireplace? Surely none of this can be anything to do with UZZ agent Kent B. Trusted..?