If I Had Legs I'd Kick You
If I Had Legs I'd Kick You

If I Had Legs I'd Kick You (2025)

6.6 ? Oct 10, 2025 1h 53m

Overview

With her life crashing down around her, Linda attempts to navigate her child's mysterious illness, her absent husband, a missing person, and an increasingly hostile relationship with her therapist.

Genres

Drama Thriller

Release Date

October 10, 2025

Rating

6.6 /10

Runtime

1h 53m

Official Trailer from YouTube

Rose Byrne

Rose Byrne

Linda

Conan O'Brien

Conan O'Brien

Therapist

A$AP Rocky

A$AP Rocky

James

Danielle Macdonald

Danielle Macdonald

Caroline

Delaney Quinn

Delaney Quinn

Child

Mary Bronstein

Mary Bronstein

Dr. Spring

Ivy Wolk

Ivy Wolk

Diana

Mark Stolzenberg

Mark Stolzenberg

Parking Attendant

Manu Narayan

Manu Narayan

Landlord

Christian Slater

Christian Slater

Father

Eva Kornet

Breathworker

Ella Beatty

Ella Beatty

Kate

Helen Hong

Helen Hong

Eva

Daniel Zolghadri

Daniel Zolghadri

Stephen

Josh Pais

Josh Pais

Brad

Ronald Bronstein

Ronald Bronstein

Caroline's Husband (voice)

Lark White

Vanessa

Laurence Blum

Laurence Blum

Police Officer

Amy Judd Lieberman

Amy Judd Lieberman

Melanie

Char Sidney

Nurse

B

Brent Marchant

9.0/10

Nov 29, 2025

In an age where life’s everyday challenges can test our wits, becoming overwhelmed is a real possibility when they pile up. Just ask Linda (Rose Byrne), a therapist who struggles to sincerely and sensitively assist her troubled patients. But that’s just the start of her problems. She’s also tending to a sick child (Delaney Quinn), the demands of which are considerable, both from the whiny, often-unappreciative youngster and her annoyingly insistent caregivers. To make matters worse, a burst pipe in the ceiling of her apartment has forced mother and child to move into a hotel, a stay that’s become unexpectedly extended due to the lack of repair work by her inattentive landlord. And, through all of these ordeals, Linda is on her own, given that her unfeeling husband (Christian Slater) is frequently away on business. As a consequence, this palette of issues has forced Linda into therapy herself with a peer counselor (Conan O”Brien), whose incessant indifference not only offers little help, but also tends to exacerbate the stress in her life. Over time, the specific pressures associated with each of these incidents begin to snowball, making coping nearly impossible. And, as time passes, Linda feels as though she’s losing herself and descending into her own personal madness. So what is she to do? That’s what this intense offering from actress-writer-director Mary Bronstein seeks to explore. This exceedingly dark comedy-drama examines what a woman on the edge might go through as the breaking point approaches. There’s an undeniably raw, edgy, realistic quality to this release, one that sometimes makes this a decidedly uncomfortable watch. The barrage of challenges to simply get through the day keeps coming at the protagonist (and, hence, viewers) relentlessly, presented here in nonstop fashion at breakneck speed. And it seems that, no matter what good faith efforts Linda makes to resolve her dilemmas, they’re never enough, often exposing her to petty, undue criticism that, in turn, prompt undue, unfair and unfounded accusations of blame and shame. All of these foregoing attributes are routinely intensified by the picture’s regular use of macabre comic relief, serving up laughs about incidents and subjects that many of us might genuinely feel guilty chuckling about. But this film’s real standout asset is the superb performance turned in by Byrne, easily the best work of her career and handily worthy of awards consideration, capably backed by Quinn, O’Brien and other cast members in fine supporting portrayals. To be sure, “If I Had Legs I’d Kick You” won’t suit everyone, and even avid cinephiles may at times find their patience, tolerance and sensibilities sufficiently challenged. Nevertheless, this is one of those “sign of the times” pictures that unflinchingly exposes much of what’s wrong with contemporary society and that we’d all be wise to take seriously if we ever hope to see improvement in a world where a lack of compassion, understanding and support are being allowed to run rampant. It’s no wonder that so many of us might feel like kicking back under conditions like this. Indeed, maybe it’s time we should all seek to grow some legs of our own.

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